Broken Words

Betrayal-these four poems were written during one of the lowest points in my life. All of them have to deal with trying to be upset or blame that person you love, but in the end realizing that you cannot. During the scripting of these I had hit a speed bump in my friendship with Danielle–and for those of you who know, that was pretty bad, but we’re good  now!– and it all occurred over this guy Sampson. And if you don’t know about that click here and here and it’ll all make sense. But to clarify, these are not directed AT either Danielle or Sampson, but are a soul searching quest of myself to try to figure out what I was doing and how to fix it.

Words forever more broken

Hearts forever now empty

I trusted you and you damned me,

I defended you!

Yet you attacked me

Why oh why did I ever befall,

To such a fate—

Covered with lies?

I stay here surrounded by an ebullient crowd

But only emptiness, and alone am I

May God only know,

The reason I can’t hate you

And by ignorance –perhaps- my anger held.

You were an idol! A bright Northern Star!

However too, a deep abyss—

Into I fell from destiny?

Or into I fell from mine own lies?

The words I say may no longer aid

Falling and falling I shan’t be saved,

Let me fall and die at the end

But truth, I know, there is no end—

From here, forever, I will always fall

From still now, my thoughts not changed

Whatever these horrors may bring

Until eternity! They be my kings

All of life now dead! Absurd!

From whence it came from broken words.

 

 

Forsaken

Betrayal-these four poems were written during one of the lowest points in my life. All of them have to deal with trying to be upset or blame that person you love, but in the end realizing that you cannot. During the scripting of these I had hit a speed bump in my friendship with Danielle–and for those of you who know, that was pretty bad, but we’re good  now!– and it all occurred over this guy Sampson. And if you don’t know about that click here and here and it’ll all make sense. But to clarify, these are not directed AT either Danielle or Sampson, but are a soul searching quest of myself to try to figure out what I was doing and how to fix it.

I will love, I will fall

I will fight, and lose it all

Ne’er have I lived through such

Ne’er will I try again

Forsake ye love and forsake your chains

Death to you! And your wondrous name

I need you not, I need you now

Why my love, do you bring me shame?

I needn’t fall for a new refrain

I shan’t be ushered by the same

For it’s a lie! O a treach’rous lie!

A tongue of deceit and rare

It is your word; they spill from you

And ne’er about them bring truth

Yet I can’t forsake you love

I want your chains; I want my heart to be yours

I love your hate and you hate my love

But now your face I dodge?

Surely oh surely will I bleed

As long as your burdens be freed

Shining so bright

And a wonderful sight

May God be just and kind

Please deliver me Lord

Set me free from a fool-hardy course

Only from nigh to return

Needless to say that something is there; that no one can recognize –